100,000+ Books, Games & Puzzles in-stock 🇳🇿

Overnight NZ-wide Delivery 🚀 Thank you for supporting our 100% NZ-owned store ❤️

It's All Your Fault!

12 Tips for Managing People Who Blame Others for Everything
4.18 goodreads logo

Ratings/reviews counts are updated frequently.

Check link for latest rating.
( 170 ratings, 15 reviews)
Book Hero Magic crafted this summary to help describe this book. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! Summary
It's All Your Fault! explains, in easy-to-understand terminology, behaviours of people who have personality disorders, particularly blaming, irrational, and impulsive behaviours. This is a growing problem—possibly affecting over 25 percent of the US population—and a predictable one that can be managed to keep everyday problems from becoming high conflict disputes.
Read More
Format: Paperback / softback
$6499
AVAILABLE WITH SUPPLIER Ships from our Auckland warehouse within 4-6 weeks

Found a better price? Request a price match

Book Hero Magic created this recommendation. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! IS THIS YOUR NEXT READ?

This book is ideal for readers seeking to understand and manage challenging interpersonal dynamics, including those dealing with personality disorders in personal or professional relationships.

Book Hero thinking about your next read

Explains in easy-to-understand terminology, the behaviors of people with personality disorders or with traits, particularly blaming, irrational and impulsive behaviors.

Author, Bill Eddy, has many (up to 50) speaking engagement/year, in which he promotes/sells books back-of-room at each event. Some are international or national conferences and others are organizations who invite him to speak at all or half-day trainings or as keynote or workshop speaker at conferences. All of Bill's books are sold at international, national and regional conferences -- Association of Family & Conciliation Courts; Academy of Professional Family Mediators. Bill does radio and print interviews upon request. — Promotion on authors websites: www.highconflictinstitute.com, www.biff.com (not "live" yet) and www.newways4families.com. — Promotion on publisher websites: www.highconflictinstitutepress.com, www.unhookedbooks.com. — Social media campaigns on authors outlets and publisher's outlets, i.e. Facebook, Twitter, blog, Pinterest. — Two years ago, over 1100 sites linked to Bill's blog and/or website. I'm not sure what those numbers are now, but they're likely the same or increased. — Publicity and promotion in conjunction with author's speaking engagements (see listing below): January 1/16 -- Handling High Conflict Personalities with the CARS Method Radio Interview of Bill Eddy by Doug Noll (book tie-in: It's All Your Fault!; BIFF), Contact: www.WSradio.com at 7:00pm Pacific Time Zone February 2/12 -- New Ways for Families: National Judicial Institute - Family Law Seminar, Quebec City, Quebec, Canada (no book tie-in) 2/20 -- 7 Tips for Managing High Conflict People, North County Bar Association, Vista, CA (book tie-in: BIFF; High Conflict People in Legal Disputes; It's All Your Fault!; New Ways for Families entire series). Contact: www.NorthCountyBar.org 2/25 -- Law and Ethics Update, Kaiser Permanente Psychosocial Clinicians, San Diego, CA (book tie-in: It's All Your Fault!; BIFF; It's All Your Fault at Work!; New Ways for Work Coaching Manual; New Ways for Work Workbook). Contact: Linda.S.Thornton@kp.org 2/27 - 28 (PST) New Ways for Families "Day Two" Training, Family Law Pathways Network, Alice Springs, NT, Australia - by Skype (book tie-in: New Ways for Families Professional Guidebook; New Ways for Families Parent Workbook; BIFF). Contact: michelle@newways4families.com March 3/1 -- Managing High Conflict People. Law School for Social Workers Annual CEU Event, Portland, OR (book tie-in: High Conflict People in Legal Disputes; BIFF; New Ways for Families entire series) Contact: www.naylaw.com 3/14 -- Transformation of High Conflict Disputes Through Mediation, 2014 Orange County Mediation Conference, University of California, Irvine, CA (book tie-in: High Conflict People in Legal Disputes; BIFF; New Ways for Families Pre-Mediation Workbook; New Ways for Families Pre-Mediation Coaching Manual). Contact: www.ocmediationconference.org 3/28 -- Managing High Conflict Personalities - in Separation and Divorce, Louisiana Chapter - Association of Family and Conciliation Courts, New Orleans, LA (book tie-in: High Conflict People in Legal Disputes; BIFF; New Ways for Families entire listing). Contact: www.afccla.org — April: “Managing High Conflict People” for Healthcare Workers in Maryland; Family Professionals in Calgary, Canada; Family law Judges in Ohio. — AFCC Conference (Presenting New Ways for Mediation method in 90-minute workshop) in Toronto in June; — Pepperdine University School of Law “Psychology of Conflict” course (Malibu, near Los Angeles) in October; — APFM Conference presenting New Ways for Mediation in October in San Diego; — 2 weeks in September in Australia: National Mediation Conference – keynote speaker and workshop trainer; Monash University School of Law course: “Managing High Conflict People in Legal Disputes”; and other groups. — Anchorage, Alaska: “New Ways for Mediation of High Conflict Disputes” to lawyers and mediators there sponsored by a law firm.

Book Hero Magic formatted this description to make it easier to read. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! Description

It's All Your Fault! explains, in easy-to-understand terminology, behaviours of people who have personality disorders, particularly blaming, irrational, and impulsive behaviours. This is a growing problem—possibly affecting over 25 percent of the US population—and a predictable one that can be managed to keep everyday problems from becoming high-conflict disputes.

Book Details

INFORMATION

ISBN: 9781936268023

Publisher: HCI Press

Format: Paperback / softback

Date Published: 05 April 2012

Country: United States

Imprint: HCI Press

Illustration: illustrations

Audience: General / adult

DIMENSIONS

Width: 152.0mm

Height: 228.0mm

Weight: 496g

Pages: 368

About the Author

Bill Eddy is a lawyer, therapist, mediator and the President of High Conflict Institute. He developed the "High Conflict Personality" theory (HCP Theory) and has become an international expert on managing disputes involving high-conflict personalities and personality disorders. He provides training on this subject to lawyers, judges, mediators, managers, human resource professionals, businesspersons, healthcare administrators, college administrators, homeowners' association managers, ombudspersons, law enforcement, therapists and others. He has been a speaker and trainer in over 25 states, several provinces in Canada, Australia, France and Sweden.

As an attorney, Bill is a Certified Family Law Specialist in California and the Senior Family Mediator at the National Conflict Resolution Center in San Diego. Prior to becoming an attorney in 1992, he was a Licensed Clinical Social worker with twelve years' experience providing therapy to children, adults, couples and families in psychiatric hospitals and outpatient clinics. He has taught Negotiation and Mediation at the University of San Diego School of Law for six years and he is on the part-time faculty of the Straus Institute for Dispute Resolution at the Pepperdine University School of Law and the National Judicial College.

Also by Bill Eddy

View all
  • BIFF
    We live in an age of rapid change and instant communication. We also live in a culture of blame and disrespect, creating a need to manage our responses to high-conflict people. A BIFF Response can be applied in any communication anywhere—online, on social media, in a letter, or even in person. It can be used at work, earning you respect...
    Paperback
    $5500
    Available
    Ships in 2-3 weeks
  • So, What's Your Proposal?
    Complain! Complain! Complain! Have you ever dealt with high-conflict people who blame you or others for one problem after another without taking any responsibility themselves? Don't you feel like wringing their necks? Instead, consider the simple method taught in this book for getting them out of the past and away from blaming everyone else. Get them to quickly focus on...
    Paperback
    $3499
    Available
    Ships in 4-6 weeks
  • It's All Your Fault at Work!
    Increasingly, we experience high-conflict people, especially narcissists, in the workplace. Angry customers. Undercutting co-workers. Bullying managers. Destructive business owners. It's All Your Fault at Work! helps you manage high-conflict people in the workplace. Once you recognize their predictable behaviour patterns, a 4-Step Method can be used to calm them, analyse your options, respond to their hostility, and set limits on...
    Paperback
    $5400
    Available
    Ships in 2-3 weeks
  • Dating Radar
    Why do so many of us commit to the wrong person? Most believe that attraction and compatibility are the keys to relationship success when, in reality, these are red flags in 15-20% of the population. When it comes to love, the brain is irrational and shortsighted. We make decisions based on incomplete information, biased understanding, and strong emotion. Love truly...
    Paperback
    $3499
    Available
    Ships in 4-6 weeks
  • BIFF at Work
    Hostile emails, letters, and conversations can drain inordinate amounts of time, emotional energy, and expense in the workplace. For over a dozen years, the BIFF method of communicating has helped thousands of people calm conflicts and create clear communication in response to misinformation, blame, and unnecessary anger in writing or in-person. This new book focuses exclusively on workplace conflicts—internal and...
    Paperback
    $3499
    Available
    Ships in 4-6 weeks
  • Calming Upset People with EAR
    The level of stress and conflict in today's world is higher than seen in decades. We all can use tools for managing the emotions this has caused. At the same time, there also appear to be more high conflict people who are preoccupied with blaming others and verbally venting or attacking those around them. Yet, these upset emotions and conflicts...
    Paperback
    $5200
    Available
    Ships in 2-3 weeks
  • Why We Elect Narcissists and Sociopaths?and How We Can Stop
    Bestselling author, therapist, lawyer, and mediator Bill Eddy describes how dangerous, high-conflict personalities have gained power in governments worldwide—and what citizens can do to keep these people out of office. The bestselling author and therapist describes how electing high-conflict personalities—from Hitler and Mao to Putin and Trump—threatens democracy. Democracy is under siege. The reason isn't politics but personalities—too many countries...
    Hardback
    $5000
    Available
    Ships in 4-6 weeks
  • Don't Alienate the Kids!
    In this tenth anniversary edition of Don't Alienate the Kids!, attorney, mediator, and therapist Bill Eddy shows readers how to protect children from the harm of alienation and high-conflict divorce, boosting their resilience by teaching them to think flexibly, manage their emotions, and moderate their behaviours. We all know breakups can get ugly. But sometimes they can get downright vicious,...
    Paperback
    $3499
    Available
    Ships in 4-6 weeks
  • Mediating High Conflict Disputes
    High conflict mediation requires a paradigm shift from traditional mediation—high conflict experts Bill Eddy and Michael Lomax show you how. Over the past ten years, the authors have been developing and practising tips for managing high conflict clients in mediation, which is now a fully developed method called New Ways for Mediation. Mediating High Conflict Disputes provides all the little...
    Paperback
    $8499
    Available
    Ships in 4-6 weeks
  • Stop Walking on Eggshells for Partners
    In a relationship with someone who has BPD or NPD? You deserve clarity, safety, and the power to choose what’s right for you. If your romantic partner, spouse, husband, wife, boyfriend, or girlfriend struggles with borderline personality disorder (BPD) or narcissistic personality disorder (NPD), you may feel trapped in a cycle of gaslighting, emotional abuse, blame, and high-conflict arguments. You...
    Paperback
    $4999
    Available
    Ships in 1 week
  • BIFF for CoParent Communication
    Coparenting is hard in any circumstance, and when doing it with someone that has a high conflict personality, it can seem impossible. The first step is to admit that you are outmatched in every way except for the ability to learn new skills related to the high conflict personality. My life did not change until I began to read, understand,...
    Paperback
    Sold Out
  • BIFF for Lawyers and Law Offices
    BIFF is simple, powerful, and impactful. This book should be mandatory reading for the entire legal industry. Once you start to use BIFF, it becomes an antidote for caustic interactions. You can't stop the poison, but BIFF gives you the antidote to counteract it safely. Read it, apply it, and start to use the power of BIFF. - Attorney Steve...
    Paperback
    Sold Out

More from Self-Help & Personal Development

View all
  • Signed Copy
    New Release
    "What Were You Thinking!?"
    Everything parents need to know about their baby, child or teen's developing brain to raise resilient, emotional intelligent kids, by globally renowned neuroscience educator Nathan Wallis. 'What were you thinking!?'If you've ever asked this in despair while watching a toddler melt down, a tween push boundaries or a teenager make a truly terrible decision, this book is for you.In "What Were...
    Paperback
    $3299
    Elsewhere:
    $3999
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • The Let Them Theory
    New York Times Bestselling Author. Millions of books sold worldwide! A Life-Changing Tool Millions of People Can't Stop Talking About What if the key to happiness, success, and love was as simple as two words? If you've ever felt stuck, overwhelmed, or frustrated with where you are, the problem isn't you. The problem is the power you give to other...
    Paperback
    $2599
    Elsewhere:
    $3200
    (8)
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • Eat Your Ice Cream
    New Release
    Eat Your Ice Cream
    The New York Times bestseller that presents a bold new vision for living well and ageing with purpose from a world-renowned health expert THE INSTANT NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLER From a leading doctor and world-renowned health expert, the simple, uplifting and practical guide to cutting through the wellness noise, living well and ageing with purpose. ‘Essential reading for anyone who...
    Paperback
    $3199
    Elsewhere:
    $4000
    (2)
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • New Release
    The Winner's Formula
    The Neuroscience of Peak Performance, Success, and Happiness Why do some people win all the time? Why do others languish? From Olympians to Formula 1 drivers, addicts to billionaires, cognitive neuroscientist Dr Kerry Spackman has spent decades working to help people understand how to succeed. In The Winner's Formula, Kerry explains what goes on in your brain when you are...
    Paperback
    $3199
    Elsewhere:
    $3999
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • Choose Your Hard
    Every path in life is hard. Being unfit and unhealthy is hard. Choosing to exercise, eat well, face discomfort, and do the difficult things is also hard. The question is: which hard do you choose? In Choose Your Hard, Professor Grant Schofield, one of New Zealand’s most cited health scientists with over 18,000 citations in the scientific literature, argues that...
    Paperback
    $3300
    Elsewhere:
    $3500
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • The Atomic Habits Daily Calendar
    New Release
    The Atomic Habits Daily Calendar
    Powerful ideas for each day of the year from the author of the #1 worldwide bestseller, Atomic Habits. Based on the principles that made Atomic Habits a global phenomenon, this daily calendar turns habit formation into a simple daily practice. Get actionable guidance, motivational insights, and system-building tools that make it easier to get a little bit better—every day of...
    Calendar
    $3699
    Elsewhere:
    $3999
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • The DOSE Effect
    The DOSE Effect offers small habits to boost your brain chemistry. "This book will help you find more motivation, create deeper connections, energise your body, and destress your mind," says Jay Shetty, author of Think Like a Monk. Life can feel overwhelming, but it doesn’t have to be. Today’s fast-paced world leaves many of us struggling with extreme emotional highs...
    Paperback
    $3199
    Elsewhere:
    $3999
    (2)
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • New Release
    Now What?
    There are countless self-help books telling you how to get the life you want—how to find your purpose, make your plan, follow your goals. Yet, too many of us are frozen in life, unfulfilled and stuck with what we have. Too often, we only see our future through a lens of the past—our past beliefs, experiences, and circumstances. We desire...
    Paperback
    $3299
    Elsewhere:
    $3999
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • We Can Do Hard Things
    We Can Do Hard Things is a powerful and inspiring guide co-authored by renowned voices Abby Wambach, Glennon Doyle, and Amanda Doyle. This compelling book offers insights and encouragement to help readers tackle life's toughest challenges. By combining personal stories with practical advice, the authors empower you to embrace resilience and courage. Their collective wisdom sheds light on the strength...
    Paperback
    $3200
    Elsewhere:
    $4000
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • Atua Wahine
    Ancient wisdom of the Māori goddesses to help you navigate the modern world Atua Wahine are the Māori goddesses who make up the world around us: earth, fire, water, the moon, and more. From the earth mother, Papatuanuku, who sustains and nurtures us, to the goddess of peace, Hineputehue, who transformed pain into beauty, and the misunderstood goddess of the...
    Hardback
    $3000
    Elsewhere:
    $3699
    (3)
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • The Myth of Normal
    A book that changes everything - from the legendary Dr Gabor Maté THE INSTANT SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLER OVER ONE MILLION COPIES SOLD We tend to believe that normality equals health. Yet what is the norm in the Western world? Mental illness and chronic disease are on an unstoppable rise. How did we get here? And what lies ahead for us?...
    Paperback
    $2400
    Elsewhere:
    $3000
    In Stock
    Ships today
  • The Anxious Generation
    A powerful argument for reclaiming childhood—and all human relationships—from the online world, from the influential social psychologist and international bestselling author. Jonathan Haidt has spent his career speaking truth and wisdom in some of the most difficult spaces—communities polarised by politics and religion, campuses battling culture wars, and now the mental health emergency hitting teenagers today in many countries around...
    Paperback
    $2299
    Elsewhere:
    $3000
    In Stock
    Ships today

Why buy from us?

Book Hero is not a chain store or big box retailer. We're an independent 100% NZ-owned business on a mission to help more Kiwis rediscover a love of books and reading!

Service & Delivery

Service & Delivery

Our warehouse in Auckland holds over 100,000 books, toys, board games and puzzles in-stock so you're not waiting for your order to arrive from overseas.

Auckland Bookstore

Auckland Bookstore

We're primarily an online store, but for your convenience you can pick up your order for free from our bookstore, which is right next door to our warehouse in Hobsonville.

Our Gifting Service

Our Gifting Service

Books make wonderful thoughtful gifts and we're here to help with gift-wrapping and cards. We can even send your gift directly to your loved one.