Parenting Lessons From Bluey

Let me start by explaining that I love Bluey (and it's creators). Everything from the TV Show that makes me laugh and cry, the storybooks that create bookends to our days parenting, and even the music soundtrack that we play on repeat (hello Dance Mode). Not only is Bluey just really wonderfully done, it's hands down one of the biggest resources I have had in becoming a parent. I feel like this needs further evidence so below I've listed out some of the key lessons Bluey has taught me and why I'm so grateful. I still remember the very first episode my husband, Edd, showed me because it was really rather good (Bike, still a family favourite).

Talk to any parent who has watched Bluey and I feel like we'll all say the same thing, that it's taught us how to play with our kids! For me, I think sometimes it can get exhausting trying to find the inner resources required to constantly enter a word of play, and Bluey is great for reminding me that it doesn't have to be anything complicated, it can just be embracing the silly moments and having fun together. The other part that I think Bluey teaches us all so effectively is how helpful play can be with children processing difficult events, or just learning about life and relationships via their play.

'Bus' is an amazing episode for this, where the whole family gets involved in a game of riding the bus together. It's hilarious for both kids and parents and a reminder about how fun life can be when we take the time to connect via play. 'Unicorse' is another one you can't not mention here. Bandit and his rather annoying puppet hijack storytime in an effort to help Bluey get to bed. I love this one for being able to see the different parenting approaches of Bandit and Chilli, and how sometimes you just need a really frustrating side character to get involved with bedtime. Lastly, 'Takeaway' is a work of genius, where dinner is delayed and eventually Bandit has to relax and embrace the way that the kids themselves are filling the time with playful bonding and adapting by looking for the opportunities to have fun while they wait, something we could all probably do better at when life sends us little curveballs. 

'Rug Island' is yet another favourite episode, where Bluey and Bingo are busy getting imaginative with colouring pens building an island. Before heading to work, Bandit takes a moment to join in and gets to see how beautiful reminder to embrace your inner child when you get the chance with your kids. It's a deceptively simple epsiode and yet it's such a powerful invitation to play with your children, to enter their world and find joy in the simple moments of play and connection with each other.

Ask me what my favourite episode of Bluey is and I may struggle to eventually choose, but we all know it's going to be 'Sleepy Time'. As a parent of a child who is wonderful in every way except for her ability to sleep solo in her bed each night, this episode never fails to make us all get teary. It's a literal work of art, but it's also the 7 and a half minutes of therapy I need to remind me that it's okay if the nights are a bit chaotic, and it's also an invitation to let go of the stress about who's sleeping where and instead just maximize sleep for the whole whānau, whatever that looks like. If you are a parent who has never watched Bluey, just take a chance and watch this one episode and then tell me if your life is not changed. I'll wait. 

I used to be SO good at being on time to things. I was that person who annoyingly would arrive right on the dot (I tried not to be that person arriving early but would wait in my car until it was socially acceptable). This feels like a faint dream from a bygone era now. Instead trying to get anywhere looks like arguments over which shoes are appropriate, losing my keys, having to get a snack, buckling everyone in the car, realizing we need a toilet visit before we can go, heading back inside, losing my keys - rinse and repeat. I'm so sorry to every person waiting on us - I promise I do try to be on time. I just don't achieve it very often anymore.

Luckily for me, my model of the best mum ever - Chilli, understands the struggle. 'Sticky Gecko' is an amazing episode where Chilli is trying to get everyone out of the house in order to get to a playdate on time, and yet is endlessly frustrated as the children do everything except efficiently get out the door. By the end of the episode, Chilli comes to the realization that I am still grappling with - that rushing children is very rarely effective, and that often the anxiety of being late can be connected to something else going on. More often that not, it's far more useful to accept that you are going to arrive a little late and take a moment to pause and check in with yourself and the chaotic gremlin who has STILL not brushed their teeth. 

I'm one of those parents who will never be good at letting go of control. I have to forcibly restrain myself when I see my child struggling with something in order to give her the chance to get through the struggle herself, or at least giving her the chance to decide when and if she needs my help. In one of the first episodes I ever saw of Bluey, 'Bike' we are forced to wait patiently and watch while a bunch of wonderful children are struggling with various things - getting their backpack on, reaching the water fountain, get to the monkey bars that are just slightly out of reach. The struggles are small and yet the importance of seeing the children get creative as they solve their issues independently helps both myself and Bluey who then decides she is willing to give her bike another go even though it's difficult. This one will forever be a teacher for me - it's okay for my child to struggle, she knows she has help if she needs it but it's even more important that she learns how capable and strong and smart she is.

There are so many amazing episodes about letting kids lead and take charge. In 'Born Yesterday' Bandit pretends to forget everything which gives Bingo and Bluey the chance to be in charge and teach him everything about the world. It's a great reversal of the usual parent-child dynamic and it can be so fun to give children the chance to teach you what they know, or to let them guide play in their own weird and wonderful ways. 'Rain' is basically a 7 minute work of art, with almost no dialogue and just a beautifully simple story about Bluey wanting to be out in the pouring rain experimenting with water flow, and Chilli eventually realizing that rather than force her inside, she should join her. I love it.

Who else is a recovering perfectionist who post becoming a parent has been forced to drop their standards and struggle every day with accepting the absolute chaos and the life of beautiful imperfections with children? Parenting is a life of making mistakes, of getting it wrong before getting it right (and then getting it wrong again), of accepting a messy house even though it hurts your brain, and of helping children with accepting they will never be perfect too. 

In 'Perfect', Bluey is trying to draw the perfect picture for her dad but struggling with the fact that she's 7 and so her drawing skills don't quite match the image in her head. The frustration she feels and the eventual realization that nothing is flawless is SO good for adults and also for the four year old artist in my house who would like to be able to draw a perfect unicorn but is still learning. 

I also love the epsiodes in Bluey where the parents mess up, a reminder that we will all continue to get it wrong and that the moments where we can repair with our children are important and valuable. In 'The Dump' Bandit accidentally throws away precious old drawings and has to apologize, whilst in 'Omelette' Chilli struggles with having Bingo involved in the kitchen while she's trying to make breakfast (why is cooking with kids SO stressful). Bluey is a reminder for us all that we will mess up, and that it's important we do so that our children learn that it's okay for them to mess up too!

And for all new parents out there, Bluey isn't just screen time to fill the time, it's 7 minutes of life lessons and parenting advice wrapped up in very easy watching (except for those stories that make us cry). Watch it with your kids, you will both enjoy the experience and learn SO much. It's also the storybooks (we have a huge collection), the wonderfully child appropriate board games, and most of all, the inspiration to treat life a little less seriously.