100,000+ Books, Games & Puzzles in-stock 🇳🇿

Enjoy overnight NZ-wide delivery from our NZ-owned independent bookstore! 🎉

You Exist Too Much

3.63 goodreads logo

Ratings/reviews counts are updated frequently.

Check link for latest rating.
( 21,101 ratings, 3,088 reviews)
Book Hero Magic crafted this summary to help describe this book. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! Summary
In You Exist Too Much by Zaina Arafat, the narrative follows a young, queer Palestinian-American woman as she navigates her identity and complex relationships. Struggling with familial expectations and romantic entanglements, she searches for self-acceptance while confronting cultural and personal challenges. The story intricately explores themes of belonging, love, and self-discovery against a backdrop of varied cultural landscapes.
Read More
Format: Paperback / softback
TEMPORARILY OUT OF STOCK Please add to wishlist to be notified when back in stock

Sorry, we're currently out of stock of You Exist Too Much. Please add to your Wishlist and we'll send you an email as soon as it's back in stock.

Book Hero Magic created this recommendation. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! IS THIS YOUR NEXT READ?

This book may appeal to you if you're drawn to introspective narratives about identity, love, and cultural dislocation. It delves into the complexities of a young Palestinian-American woman's life as she grapples with her sexual orientation and the expectations of her traditional upbringing. The poignant storytelling and deeply personal journey offer an insightful exploration of belonging and self-discovery.

Book Hero thinking about your next read

Set between the US and the Middle East, this is an electrifying coming-of-age story about love, identity and sexual desire against the backdrop of traditional values and religious views.

Book Hero Magic formatted this description to make it easier to read. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! Description

‘Deeply compelling... sexy.’ Roxane Gay

‘Takes you on a dizzying tour of love addiction, rehab, homophobia, betrayal, obsession and the aching need for a mother's unconditional love. At different times throughout, you'll find the protagonist needy, reckless and selfish but also smart, intuitive and trapped between two cultures - because as we all know, humans are nothing if not complicated. Roxane is right: this deserves five stars.’ Stylist

Told in vignettes that flash between the US and the Middle East, Zaina Arafat's powerful debut novel traces her protagonist's progress from blushing teen to creative and confused adulthood.

In Brooklyn, she moves into an apartment with her first serious girlfriend and tries to content herself with their comfortable relationship. Soon, her longings, so deeply hidden during her teenage years, explode into reckless romantic encounters and obsessions with other people, which results in her seeking unconventional help to face her past traumas and current demons.

As heard on Radio 2 Book Club, this captivating novel is perfect for readers who love Maggie Nelson and Garth Greenwell. Opening up the fantasies and desires of one young woman caught between cultural, religious, and sexual identities, You Exist Too Much is a captivating story charting two of our most intense longings - for love, and a place to call home.

What people are saying about You Exist Too Much:

‘Real and deliciously messy.’ Attitude

‘An elegantly written debut... A thought-provoking exploration of love and belonging, and how the two come together to create a sense of self.’ New European

Exquisitely written and crafted with a compelling lightness of touch.’ Living Magazine

‘A nuanced, sparky debut.’ Observer

‘A wonderfully written, queer, coming-of-age story.’ i Newspaper

‘A novel of self-discovery following a Palestinian-American girl as she navigates queerness, love addiction, and a series of tumultuous relationships.’ The Millions, One of the Most Anticipated Books of the Year

Powerful... With You Exist Too Much, Arafat announces herself as a provocative and insightful writer.’ Irish Times

Book Hero Magic summarised reviews for this book. While it's new and still learning, it may not be perfect - your feedback is welcome! HOW HAS THIS BEEN REVIEWED?

The book by Zaina Arafat is widely praised as a compelling queer coming-of-age story that navigates themes of bisexuality, love, and addiction. Critics highlight its captivating narrative, taking readers through a journey defined by cultural complexity, emotional struggles, and the search for belonging. The prose is noted for its freshness and wit, while the debut is lauded for its compassion, nuanced portrayal of relationships, and the exploration of the protagonist's multifaceted identity.

Book Hero reading reviews

Book Details

INFORMATION

ISBN: 9780349701776

Publisher: John Murray Press

Format: Paperback / softback

Date Published: 18 November 2021

Country: United Kingdom

Imprint: Dialogue Books

Audience: General / adult

DIMENSIONS

Spine width: 26.0mm

Width: 126.0mm

Height: 196.0mm

Weight: 217g

Pages: 272

About the Author

Zaina Arafat is a Palestinian-American author. Her debut novel, You Exist Too Much, won a 2021 Lambda Literary Award and was named Roxane Gay's favorite book of 2020. Her work has appeared in publications including The New York Times, The Washington Post, The Atlantic, VICE, BuzzFeed, Granta, Guernica, The Believer, Harper's Bazaar and Virginia Quarterly Review. She holds an MA in international affairs from Columbia University and an MFA from the University of Iowa. In recognition of her work, Zaina was awarded the Arab Women/Migrants from the Middle East fellowship at Jack Jones Literary Arts and named a Champion of Pride by The Advocate. She is currently at work on a novel and an essay collection.

Also by Zaina Arafat

View all
  • Our Arab
    Pre-order
    Our Arab
    Of the many Palestinian Americans in the diaspora, few have direct experiences or memories of their ancestral land, if any at all. So how does one maintain a connection to a home so volatile, ever-shrinking, and nearly unattainable? And how does a child of diaspora raise a child of diaspora, at a time when Palestinians throughout the world—particularly those living...
    Paperback
    $3999
    Pre-order
    Out 29 Sep 2026

More from General Fiction

View all
  • The Wedding People
    'BEST READ OF THE YEAR SO FAR' THE TIMES 'BOOKS AS FUN AS THIS ONE ARE FEW AND FAR BETWEEN' GUARDIAN Phoebe Stone arrives at a grand beachside hotel in Rhode Island wearing her best dress and least comfortable shoes. Immediately she is mistaken for one of the wedding people — but she's actually the only guest at the Cornwall...
    Paperback
    $2399
    Elsewhere:
    $2799
    (3)
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • Throne of Glass Box Set (Paperback)
    Enter the realm. Unleash the darkness. Live the legend. Discover the worldwide phenomenon of the #1 New York Times-bestselling Throne of Glass series in this gorgeous 8-book box set! In a land without magic, an assassin is summoned to the castle. She has no love for the vicious king who rules from his throne of glass, but she has not...
    Set
    $12400
    Elsewhere:
    $15500
    (6)
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • The Goal
    Welcome to Briar U!Get ready for your newest obsession . . . Discover the addictive world of the Off-Campus series from The Queen of Hockey Romance, Elle Kennedy!Read The Goal now for the perfect forced proximity romance! She's good at achieving her goals . . . College senior Sabrina James has her whole future planned out: graduate from college, kick...
    Paperback
    $2499
    Elsewhere:
    $2799
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • Red Rising
    The first book in the incredible New York Times bestselling series Darrow is a Helldiver, toiling beneath the surface of Mars. As a member of the Red caste, he performs grueling labor in the belief that his sacrifice will enable future generations to one day inhabit the surface of the Red Planet. The Reds are humankind's lowest caste, living in...
    Paperback
    $2200
    Elsewhere:
    $2799
    (1)
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • New Release
    The Ballad of Falling Dragons [Special Deluxe edition]
    The No.1 Sunday Times bestselling sensation When the Moon Hatched continues with the second book in The Moonfall Series, The Ballad of Falling Dragons… Raeve’s thirst for vengeance continues to burn, as does her love for Kaan Vaegor – a staunch beacon from a past she’s yet to face. With Rekk’s blood still fresh on her hands, she learns the...
    Hardback
    $5999
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • Project Hail Mary
    Project Hail Mary by Andy Weir, the SUNDAY TIMES and NEW YORK TIMES bestselling author of The Martian, offers a gripping new adventure in hard science fiction. With endorsement from notable figures such as Barack Obama and a slew of five-star reviews, this novel promises a thrilling and intellectually stimulating journey. Ryland Grace, a lone astronaut, finds himself on a...
    Paperback
    $2399
    Elsewhere:
    $2400
    (4)
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • Carl's Doomsday Scenario
    Join Carl and his ex-girlfriend's cat Princess Donut as they fight fantastical creatures and deadly mobs in the second book in the smash-hit Dungeon Crawler Carl series -now with bonus material exclusive to the print edition Now on the third floor, Carl and Donut have to fight harder than ever. They've already proven that a Coast Guard vet and once-and-forever...
    Hardback
    $4699
    Elsewhere:
    $6000
    (1)
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • The Score
    Welcome to Briar U! Get ready for your newest obsession... Discover the addictive world of the Off-Campus series from The Queen of Hockey Romance, Elle Kennedy! Read The Score now for the perfect friends with benefits romance! He knows how to score, on and off the ice... Allie Hayes is in crisis mode. With graduation looming, she still doesn't have...
    Paperback
    $2499
    Elsewhere:
    $2799
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • Golden Son
    ENDER'S GAME meets THE HUNGER GAMES in this, the second in an extraordinary trilogy from an incredible new voice.'I'm still playing games. This is just the deadliest yet.' Darrow is a rebel forged by tragedy. For years he and his fellow Reds worked the mines, toiling to make the surface of Mars inhabitable. They were, they believed, mankind's last hope....
    Paperback
    $2400
    Elsewhere:
    $2799
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • Theo of Golden
    THE INTERNATIONAL BESTSELLING PHENOMENON'For anything to be truly good, there must be love in it. Nothing is what it's supposed to be if love is not at the core.' One morning, a stranger arrives in the town of Golden. No one knows who he is or where he came from…His name is Theo and he's arrived there by chance –...
    Paperback
    $2899
    Elsewhere:
    $3499
    (5)
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • New Release
    On Mystic Lake
    One of the greatest storytellers of our time - Delia Owens, author of Where the Crawdads Sing Annie Colwater's only child has just left home for school in England. On that same day, her husband of twenty years confesses that he's in love with a younger woman. Left alone in the beautiful California house which was once a home, Annie...
    Paperback
    $3100
    Elsewhere:
    $3800
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow
  • East of Eden
    Set against the backdrop of the fertile Salinas Valley in California, East of Eden is a profound and compelling novel by John Steinbeck, one of the greatest writers of the 20th century. This masterful narrative charts the intertwining destinies of two families—the Trasks and the Hamiltons—across multiple generations. Steinbeck's intricate portrayal of human nature and enduring exploration of moral themes...
    Paperback
    $2499
    Elsewhere:
    $2600
    In Stock
    Ships tomorrow

Why buy from us?

Book Hero is not a chain store or big box retailer. We're an independent 100% NZ-owned business on a mission to help more Kiwis rediscover a love of books and reading!

Service & Delivery

Service & Delivery

Our warehouse in Auckland holds over 100,000 books, toys, board games and puzzles in-stock so you're not waiting for your order to arrive from overseas.

Auckland Bookstore

Auckland Bookstore

We're primarily an online store, but for your convenience you can pick up your order for free from our bookstore, which is right next door to our warehouse in Hobsonville.

Our Gifting Service

Our Gifting Service

Books make wonderful thoughtful gifts and we're here to help with gift-wrapping and cards. We can even send your gift directly to your loved one.