Searching for Charmian

When forty-eight-year-old Suzanne Chick discovers the identity of her birth mother, suddenly nothing will satisfy her but knowing everything. Charmian was nineteen when she gave birth to her baby girl and had to give her up for adoption. By the time Suzanne unearthed her birth mother’s name, Charmian was dead, having taken her own life in 1969 at the age of forty-five. By then she was a beloved columnist, novelist and essayist whose name was known to thousands of readers. But for all her talent, intelligence and extraordinary beauty, Charmian's life was marked by deep unhappiness.

As Suzanne learns about the mother she will never meet, she finds herself re-examining the course her own life has taken, gaining insight into the woman who brought her up – her adoptive mother, Marjorie Shaw. More than just a fascinating piece of literary history, this is a moving account of the consequences of adoption and Suzanne's search for identity.

‘My mother’s life changed forever the day she discovered her birth mother was Charmian Clift. In the tsunami of self-discovery that followed this surprising revelation, Mum went on to write her own book, Searching for Charmian, as she turned her life and identity upside down discovering the mother she never knew … Ma, growing up, I never realised what an extraordinary woman you were, because you were just there being amazing in an effortless dance of being yourself. But now I know, and I wonder at my luck, having you as my mother. Every time I look at your face I see a postcard from my future and I’m glad of it. I love that face more than the sun.’