Trigger Warning

Trigger Warning is a story of success, triumph, trauma, and overcoming. This is the story of a former Special Operations Engineer as he worked relentlessly to rekindle his life after the war. Having worked alongside Australia’s Special Forces, he discusses in great detail the exploits that he was tasked to perform as an engineer during his multiple tours to Afghanistan, during some of the roughest years of the war. However, this tale is something more, as it is also a human story, of a son chasing his father’s approval, the challenges of growing up in a shadow, and one man’s unrelenting drive to make peace with the demons that followed him home.

Nathan became a Special Operations Engineer and chose to perform one of the most revered job roles during the conflict in Afghanistan, search and clearance of Improvised Explosive Devices. Nathan found himself involved in countless traumatic situations throughout his tours, from when his vehicle struck an IED and exploded, to the fear that he felt having laid on top of a pressure plate with the main explosive charge being underneath five of his mates behind him. These hidden bombs were littered all over the battlespace and became so feared, that soldiers were known to refuse to get out of their vehicle until an engineer had checked the ground first. These tours would inevitably take a toll on Nathan, both physically and psychologically, but due to his inability to look inwards and his negative association towards vulnerability, he was unable to see or accept its impact until it was too late.

Post-war, Nathan hit rock bottom, and believed that to leave this world was the only way out. Nathan’s climb out of the darkness was supported by a rather bizarre contraption, where he managed to find purpose through an old, beaten and battered off-road racing sidecar that his dad used to race back in the 80’s. Nathan ultimately made a profound recovery, and although forever scarred by his active service, no longer do his demons define him. Nathan now embraces vulnerability to its utmost and uses his experiences to help inspire others. Vulnerability was never a sign of weakness, as Nathan had once believed, but is now the truest test of bravery imaginable, for it took more courage for Nathan to face himself and his demons than it ever did to stand firm on the battlefield.