How To Know a Person

How to Know a Person by David Brooks is a deeply practical and heartfelt guide that delves into the art of truly understanding others to foster meaningful connections in all aspects of life. From home and work to broader societal interactions, this book guides readers on a journey towards deeper and more empathetic relationships.

In this insightful work, Brooks, the renowned author of The Road to Character and The Second Mountain, explores the fundamental premise that to genuinely care for someone, you must first understand them. Whether hiring, marrying, befriending, or simply working alongside someone, the ability to see them clearly and make them feel recognized and valued is paramount.

Brooks reflects on a compelling truth he has come to believe: "The older I get, the more I come to the certainty that there is one skill at the centre of any healthy family, company, classroom, community, or nation—the ability to see each other, to know other people, to make them feel valued, heard, and understood."

Despite its importance, this skill is often lacking in society today. Many people feel invisible, unseen, and misunderstood. In How to Know a Person, Brooks tackles this issue head-on, offering essential questions and insights. He asks, if you want to truly know a person, what kind of attention should you give them? What types of conversations should you engage in? What aspects of a person's story should you focus on?

Known for his inquisitive nature, Brooks draws on his vast knowledge of psychology, neuroscience, theatre, history, and education to present a comprehensive and hopeful approach to human connection. This book is not just a guide but a call to action, encouraging readers to become more considerate and understanding towards others. It is a blueprint for finding joy in being truly seen and understanding others deeply.

How to Know a Person addresses a societal crisis characterised by fragmentation, hostility, and misperception, offering a remedy through the profound and creative act of truly seeing another person. Brooks challenges readers to look someone in the eye and acknowledge the greatness within them, consequently discovering something greater within themselves.

This book is for anyone searching for connection, seeking to foster understanding, and yearning for mutual recognition. It offers a path towards a more connected and empathetic society, providing tools and insights to transform the way we relate to each other.